In the Superior Court

IN THE SUPERIOR COURT OF HEALTHY LIVING

IN THE HIGH COURT OF NUTRITION

PLANET EARTH

AD 2013

SODIUM CHLORIDE
(affectionately called SALT)                                          PLAINTIFF/APPLICANT
VRS
THE WORLD HEALTH ORGANISATION                    DEFENDANT/RESPONDENT
(Al-So called WHO)

MOTION ON NOTICE

TAKE NOTICE that Quarrelsome & Partners, Lawyers for and on behalf of  the Plaintiff/Applicant herein shall move the Honourable Court for an order of Injunction to stop the Defendant/Respondent herein whether by themselves or their agents, workmen, servants, assigns and all other persons, natural or otherwise claiming through them,  from spear-heading, propagating, facilitating, encouraging or otherwise engendering by any means whatsoever attacks on the semi-good character and high reputation of the Plaintiff/Applicant pending the final determination of the issues between  the parties in terms of this motion paper and the supporting affidavit.
Court to be moved on……..the ……day of ……..2013 at 9.00 in the forenoon or so soon thereafter.

DATED AT SALT-TOWN  CONDOMINIUM THIS …15..DAY OF …July…2013.

SUPPORTING AFFIDAVIT

I, SODIUM CHLORIDE of Salt-town Estates solemnly swear to this affidavit and state that:

1. I am the Applicant/Deponent and I swear to this affidavit on matters which are within my personal knowledge and experience or have otherwise been brought to my attention in the course of my usage in soups and industries.
2. For centuries, I have served mankind very well. From being used in cooking meals to preserving food, to being used in food and other product processing. I gladly play my roles. My work doesn’t stop here.
3. I continue to play roles in your body as well. For instance inside the body, my first name, Sodium regulates blood pressure.
4. How I do this would require me giving you a physiology lecture which I bet you are probably not ready for.  If you however insist on knowing more, I recommend WHO, FSA, CASH etc websites to read.
5. I love to read everything readable, listen to everything listenable and watch everything watchable and it was during these activities I came across stories that have saddened my heart leading to the present lawsuit against WHO.
6. Do you know CASH, WASH, PWASH, AWASH? I am not really bothered about the first letters of the acronyms. What bothers me is the last three letters ASH, Action on Salt and Health. So whether it is consensus or world, the fact that actions are being taken on me is worrying.
7.  I play good roles especially concerning health, regulating blood pressure. So why would groups, countries, organization take actions on me?
8. Do you know this year, most health awareness campaigns worldwide are on salt? It is one thing to get the world’s attention with good deeds but it is another when it is for the wrong reasons.
9. A good campaign to educate the world about my true character is not an abomination to me and I may support it sometimes.
10. PARTICULARS OF A FRIENDLY CAMPAIGN

a)     Sodium regulates blood pressure. Hence Sodium’s regulation of your blood pressure is a direct response to the amount of Sodium and me you take into your body.
b)     The more of me consumed, the more I put pressure on your blood regulation believing you want it, judging from your heavy intake of me.
c)      For instance, when you consume more than a teaspoonful of me a day (5g/day), you increase the amount of my first name, Sodium in your body. It then puts more pressure on your blood regulation and when this continues your blood pressure becomes elevated.
d)     The unintentional activity of Sodium elevates your blood pressure beyond the normal range. I must however say, other factors contribute to elevated blood pressure but it looks like my activity is the highest of all the risk factors.
e)     This elevated blood pressure predisposes you to hypertension, a major risk factor of cadiovascular diseases.
f)       You know, one in three adults worldwide is hypertensive. I know you would doubt me because the one in three adults you meet show no sign of hypertension. This is because hypertension unlike other diseases has no symptoms making it very dangerous.

1. The WHO and others intensify educative campaigns on the nitty-gritty of                   my  true character to point out my usefulness and harmfulness.
2.  All persons beware that they consume salted nuts, chips, pizza, chicken, fries, cereals and many more on their own volition and at their own peril.
3.  It is only just and equitable that this honourable court orders the WHO and others to refrain from attacking my character and person for the hypertension, heart attacks and sudden death of persons who consume me without restraint.
4.  Just imagine, how can you complain: “ waiter! There is soup in my salt!” and turn around to blame me? That is injustice.
5. I solemnly swear.

DATED AT QUARRELSOME & PARTNERS CHAMBERS, SALT-TOWN THIS…DAY OF….2013.

Credit: Augustine Kidisil and Irene Danquah

Posted in: CASH, High Blood Pressure, Hypertension, Salt, Sodium, Sodium Chloride, WASH, WHO